Getting Comfortable with the “F” word

Do you remember as a kid being told not to use the F-word? I do. For me that F-word has evolved over the years. Sometimes with four letters and other time with more. The point is the F-word has been part of my vocabulary for quite sometime now. And depending on the context it holds different hues as it has transformed my life in so many ways. By this point you are probably wondering if I am talking about the proverbial four-letter F-word. Well, it’s one but probably not the one you’re thinking of. And it’s not the F-word I am referring to. More on that in a moment.


So, were you thinking of “Fear” as the F-word? This little word has shaped my life in so many ways. It has kept me from living purposefully for many years as my protector and guardian. It has pushed me into becoming an Olympic award-winning chef.

Maybe you were thinking it was “Fatherhood.” No, that’s not the F-word I am thinking of and yet the impact of fatherhood has been a tremendous learning and growth experience for me. Nothing prepares you more for life than having children. The thing is kids don’t come with an owner’s manual and even if they did, as a guy, I probably wouldn’t have read it. So, it’s a paint by numbers exercise hoping you can stay within the lines as best you can.

Or what about “Failure”? Yeah, that’s a big one, isn’t it? And let me say, I’ve had my fair share as I am sure many of you have. Let’s face it, we aren’t living fully if we are not challenging the edges of our comfort zone. Failing is inevitable, being a failure is an illusion and suffering in failure is a choice. Those are hard lessons to learn.

And while these F-words have made an impact on my life the one that stands above them all is Faith. It’s that part of us that sits quietly in the background and as Yogananda would say, “whispering from eternity” telling me everything is perfect, just as is.


And so, it has taken me quite a while to get comfortable with this idea of faith. To me, it not a religious thing, although it could be. It is about being grounded with an inner knowing of who I am at my core. Living as authentically as I can with passion and compassion. Loving those who are easy to love and not, including me.

It is about embracing all parts of me the darkness and the light. The highs and the lows. The tears and the joy. The pain and the exhilaration. Ultimately, knowing regardless of the score, that I am whole and complete just as spirit has always intended.

So, as I look back on the breadcrumbs of my life, I can see where Faith has always been in the background guiding me, encouraging me, inspiring me and on occasion prodding me. Today, I am much more comfortable with this F-word. Because I now know that faith is the only thing needed to live a life OF purpose ON purpose.

Live with purpose, passion and power, my friends, allowing faith to course through you and as you.

Alain Dumonceaux